Jared Dinerstein

*What was your mission like?

My mission was very non-standard. I was called to the Greece, Athens mission in December, 1995. I was specifically called to labor in the zone of Albania. I entered the MTC in March, 1996, and entered Albania that May. Two months after I arrived in Albania, it be it's own mission. In March, 1997 my entire mission (33 missionaries/seniors/president and wife) was evacuated to Italy due to a civil war. I was reassigned to the London England South mission 2 days after the evacuation, then reassigned to the Rome Italy mission 2 days after that. Five months later I was able to return to Albania where I served the remainder of my mission, through April 1998.

I was shot at, I saw tracers shooting across the sky every night for weeks on end, I dragged a bleeding man from an alley who had been attacked during this time - it took an hour to get his blood out of my clothes, I saw people who were shot, and I saw kids running down the street with AK47's that they had looted from military weapons depots.

The day of the evacuation my entire mission was gathered at the mission home waiting for word from the embassy - the word that would let us know when/how we were to get to there. We had been told that an armored personnel carrier was going to come get us, however, we received word later that the vehicle(s) could not come get us as there was too much weapons fire in the area - so we were told we were on our own. My mission president called us all together for a word of prayer, after which he told us that we would be safe if we traveled in groups of 2 or 3 and walked across Albania's capital, Tirana, to the US Embassy. This was a 3 - 5 mile trip, through gun-fire, and mob brutality. After smiling bravely at each other, we headed out and started walking to the Embassy. Interestingly enough, every time we would come to a street, we would hear/see gunfire. However, every time we would enter the street, the gunfire would cease, we would pass through safely, and would begin again as soon as we passed through.

My mission changed the way I looked at the Gospel, my membership in the Church, as well as the safety, secure, and freedom that we enjoy here in the USA. It changed all of these for the better I think.

*What is the silliest thing another Church member has ever said to you?

"Would you kiss your mother with that tongue?" -- in reference to words like heck, freak, etc. -- personally, I wouldn't kiss my mother with any tongue - period.

*Why do you believe what you believe?

I have seen too much, experienced too much, and felt too much to ever give in to any doubts. Miracles do not convert, but I have seen miracles come to, and flow through, the converted.

**What do you believe?*

I believe that Jesus is the Christ. That he is the Son of God. I believe that there is, in fact, a God in heaven who knows and loves me, and most likely shakes his head at my foolishness over and over and over. I believe that these Heavenly Beings do speak to man today, and that Joseph Smith was chosen to be a Seer and a Prophet, and that through him, Christ restored His church to this earth. There is revelation today. God does speak to man - and it's AWESOME.

*If you have doubts, why do you stay?

My doubts (and I have them) arise from my own lack of spiritual activity - when I don't feel direction/guidance from the spirit, I begin to wonder if I ever did, or if, in fact, I made it all up - and then I'll have the opportunity to perform a priesthood ordinance, attend the temple,etc., and I'll feel the spirit, and the doubt is washed away. I truly think that it is the spirit that binds us, daily to Christ, and when we're not doing what needs to be done to have the spirit, that is when doubts come.

*How did you gain your testimony?

First Discussion, Fourth Principle, teaching about Joseph Smith in Albanian, in the MTC, to my companion. I started to say, "Une pashe nje kolon drite... (I saw a pillar of light...) and my whole body was awash with fire and goose bumps, and a desire to cry, smile, cheer, shout for joy - and hug everyone around me. It was, honestly, my own personal 'day of Pentecost'. I cannot deny what I felt that day, and how I have felt countless times since sharing my personal testimony Joseph Smith. I know he was a prophet. I know because the Holy Ghost bore witness to me that what I was saying was true. It was the first time that I remember knowing what I was feeling, and recognizing what it was. Changed my life forever that day.

*What challenges your faith? What strengthens it?

The greatest challenge to my faith is two fold:

1) Members of the Church doing/saying things that are either offensive or really condescending - but then I remember that the church is a hospital for sinners, not a resort of saints.

2) Realizing, daily, that the atonement applies to me, regardless of how stupid I've been (this is also what strengthens me the most). When I start to think it doesn't I begin to emotionally 'give up' - and think that (and this is the phrase that goes through my mind the most) "there is no place for me at the table of the Bridegroom." Obviously this isn't true, but it is what I think at times. Gratefully, after careful consideration, I realize that this isn't the truth, and that I am the reason that Father placed a Savior in The Plan of Salvation - for me. It's humbling and strengthening all at the same time.

Anyways, that's my two bits, I am grateful for my membership in God's Kingdom and honestly feel nothing but sadness for those whom have served missions and have since let go of the iron rod. I would to God that all would believe in Christ and find place in His Kingdom - that day in the MTC changed my life, and when things get rough, I think back to it and I find strength to endure until the next time I am granted an opportunity to commune with the Holy Ghost.

Thanks for the opportunity to share,
Jared Dinerstein
"Skenderbeg" on www.mormonapologetics.com